The Creation Story

The Creation Story
1 In the beginning TWT & TMT* created the Chipotle lunch and the gathering thereto.

2 And the lunch was initially without attendance, and void; and stillness was upon the face of Chipotle. And the spirits of TMT & TWT moved over the halls of S70 and the simulation laboratory.

3 And TMT & TWT said, Let there be Burrito Day: and there was. And the initial crowds gathered.

4 And the creators saw Burrito Day, that it was good: and they divided the distribution list from the uninvited.

5 And the creators called the list blessed, and the uninvited they called accursed. And morning golf followed by burrito lunch were the first Friday.

6 And the creators said, Let there be a dichotomy in the midst of the list, and let it divide the merely lucky from those that "get IT".

7 And they made the "Cc:" for the merely lucky, and divided these (which were under constant probation) from those that "get IT" (always in the "To:" section): and it was so.

8 And they called the entire distribution list Heaven. And many early mornings of golf followed by Burrito Day lunch were the second era.

9 And they said, Let the "To:" and "Cc:" lists be gathered together unto one place, the Chipotle veranda, and let the extreme rage appear: and it was so.

10 And TMT called the rage "State Zero"; and the gathering together of the lists TWT called Burrito Day: and TWT & TMT saw that it was good.

11And the creators said, Let the BDEC bring forth the weekly Burrito Day Email (BDE), with the witty comment, and the insightful aphorism after their kind, the cathartic rants and screeds after their kind: and it was so.

12 And TWT & TMT brought forth weekly the BDE, with brilliant writing, insightful and wise comments aplenty, and theorems and corollaries multiplying: and they saw that it was good.

13 And many early mornings of golf followed by Burrito Day lunch were the third era.

14 And they said, Let there be rules in the firmament of the veranda to divide the center of attention from the rest; and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and years:

15 And let these rules be as lights on a dark veranda making TMT the center of attention: and it was so.

16 And God made two great lights; the great light TMT to rule Burrito Day, and the dazzling light Hussain to co-rule: he made those of the distribution list also.

17 And God set them weekly in the midst of the veranda to give light and wisdom and rage to those favored of the distribution list,

18 And to rule over Burrito Day, ensuring the absence of "side conversations" and the
appropriate "community chip etiquette": and all could see that it was good.

19 And many early mornings of golf followed by Burrito Day lunch were the fourth era.

20 And the creators said, Let the fertile mind of TMT bring forth abundantly the theorem and corollary that giveth life, and definitions that may fly above the understanding of those that don't "get IT".

21 And TMT created "The Fundamental Theorem", for which every living creature that moveth should have utmost respect: and God saw that it was good.

22 And TMT blessed "The Fundamental Theorem", saying, fill the minds of the populace, and let it multiply in the earth. For in doing so, it will bring safety to those who listen.

23 And many early mornings of golf followed by Burrito Day lunch were the fifth era.

24 And after awhile TMT said, I shall get myself to another place of employ and the legend shall sprout and multiply in another place and be joined with the current form: and it was so.

25 And TMT made Burrito Day to multiply across the face of the aerospace industry: and all saw that it was good.

27 So TMT created Burrito Day in his own image, in the vortex of extreme rage and "The Fundamental Theorem" created he it; "To:" and "Cc:" created he them.

28 And TMT blessed it, and said unto the list, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the tortilla, and the salsa, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth that doesn't "get IT".

29 And TMT & TWT saw every thing that they had made, and, behold, it was very good. And many early mornings of golf followed by Burrito Day lunch were the sixth era.

30 Thus Burrito Day and the lists and theorems were finished, and all the host of them. And TMT rested from all the work he had done, maintaining constant vigilance over his entire domain.

Indolent Kyle Summary: Just read the entire email! This kind of genius cannot be condensed.